Back at the Barnyard Review/Transcript
Snotty Boy: 'It is my bathtime! Who wants to scrub me down? *laughs* ''(Intro) Alright, there's something very important about this show that I need to talk about ''right away, ''because if I don't talk about it, it's going to be very, very distracting. it might still be distracting after I bring it up. Male cows...well, actually there is no such thing as a male cow. "Cows" are what we know as "female ''steers''." Male steers, are "bulls." And uh...male steers...do not have udders. So...one of my main problems with this show, is that I have no idea what Otis has between his legs. But they're not what the animators thought they are, I'm sure. Uh...there is no way around this. Once you know that male steer don't have udders, you can only imagine that Otis has four dicks that are clearly on display! Making matters worse is that his catchphrase is "Milk me!", which I guess...the writers thought was cute, but considering what you have to do to milk a cow, it makes it sound like Otis is asking people for a handjob. Constantly. Look, I'm not asking for shows to get all of their animal facts right, although it would be nice, I can't imagine how many cats have had severe stomach problems because kids kept trying to give them milk, but I've never had an animal fact screwup be...this incredibly distracting. I'm sure that this is probably just me, but I kind of expect a show about ''cows to understand a thing or two about cows. Let me put it this way, if ''Home on the Range ''could get this right, if every other Saturday-morning cartoon could get this right, I kinda expect ''Barnyard ''to as well. And normally I wouldn't bring this up, except I don't have much to say about ''Back at the Barnyard ''otherwise. I will say that this is a show that I don't like, in fact, about a year ago I was planning on doing a whole review for ''Back at the Barnyard, even to the point I bought the stupid show on DVD to actually get into the nuts and bolts, but when I watched ''episode after '''''episode, I saw that there was no nuts and bolts. This show has ''so little ''substance, much less than any of the Nicktoons we've seen so far. Maybe even more than Doug. What's this show about? Well, it's based on a movie that no one remembers called Barnyard. Actually, I thought that the movie was pretty good. It was about a cow named Otis. He constantly got into trouble much to the disappointment of his father. This comes to a head when Otis's irresponsibility and refusal to do his basic responsibilities, eventually leads to his father getting killed by coyotes...in a pretty sad death scene. Throughout the movie, Otis learns that he needs to become more responsible and finally manages to protect the farm. The ''show '''Back at the Barnyard ''is about Otis being stupid, irresponsible, and constantly playing pranks on everyone. It's not a prequel either. Otis' father is dead in the series. Although, he or his death is never outright mentioned, but, he is definitely not around anymore. Come to think about it, the overall premise of this show...is ''really ''disrespectful to the movie that it's based on. But what is the '''show about, ignoring the movie? The show is about every single other cartoon ever! If-if you had to ask me, what is my idea of a stereotypical cartoon, like if you asked somebody out there to just describe what they thought a cartoon was, even if they've never watched it before, and they've only heard stereotypes about cartoons, this is the show that they would describe. My main point here is that Back at the Barnyard ''is pretty mediocre! It has character types that you've seen ''time and time ''again. The troublemaking main character, the female friends who are constant killjoys, the authority figure blind to talking animals or toys or space aliens or whatever, and the one crazy person who actually sees this, getting shit on by the world around them for it. And Sheen Estevez. It's the same voice actor who played Sheen from ''Jimmy Neutron ''doing the exact same voice, for the mouse. It's just the less funny version of him. Even when this show first came on, I noticed it, and it was a constant annoyance then too. And that was before I had my problem with voice actors playing the same exact voice in every single show. Sheen Estevez just has this ''really distinct voice that's hard to ignore. And then there's the jerk neighbor kid who's a bit of a bully to the main characters, but is always willing to let out a...you might recognize him from one of the most popular and long-lived cartoons of all fucking time! Like any way you parse it, they just stole 'Nelson from ''The Simpsons. There is ''nothing ''else to this character. His name is Snotty by the way. Because...that's what you name your kid, Snotty. And how about those episodes? Making a movie...hypnosis...prank war...random character believes he's royalty...running for mayor, you've seen these a thousand times! Literally, the only thing original about this show is the fuck-up with giving Otis an udder. I ''abandoned ''doing a review for this one back in the day, because there's ''nothing ''to say about it! Like, I tried to look for the most...worse episode ever, and even then, even watching the worst episode of this show "Some Like it Snotty," i-it just had ''nothing ''for me to comment on. I mean, the animation? It's okay...but, th-this show is kinda like white noise. Maybe that's why it was on so often, it's just generic animated mush. Look, I'm sorry this is a shorter one, but it, has to be, there's ''nothing '''else to say about this show. It is one of the most "five out of ten" shows that I've ever seen. It's the animation equivalent of fruit at the bottom of yogurt without any fruit in it. It's the already-been-chewed gum of Nickelodeon shows, and it's...lukewarm water of cartoons. If any of these clips seem interesting to you, might I recommend literally watching anything else. Because it's clear to me that you've never seen a cartoon in your life. What were we talking about again? ''Back at the Barnyard? I-I don't think I've ever heard of that. Perhaps for the best. 'Announcer: '''Coming up, it's- ''(Shows clip of The Mighty B! intro) (End Credits Theme: "I Won't Back Down" from the Barnyard movie) Category:Nick-o-Rama Category:Transcripts